Prayer for the Dying

In the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, Amen. Thank you God for giving me this day. Please help me be a good person today who says and does the right thing at work, and help me drive safely to and from there without getting into an accident, which shouldn’t be hard right now since traffic is so light. Help me not be sarcastic or negative to my essential co-workers no matter what stupid thing they might say. Help me have a positive day at work amongst the cranky public I have to deal with, and, last but not least…please kill my wife. I don’t want it to be painful or have her suffer; I just want her gone, that’s all. If you can please put me out of my misery by getting rid of her, I’d really appreciate it. She’s always angry and sad, and she’s never going to lose all the weight she gained after we got married. We can’t afford a divorce, and if I kill her I’ll screw it up and wind up in jail for the rest of my life. If you can find a way to kill her peacefully, like giving her a heart attack in her sleep, or just a minor case of COVID-19 that kills her quickly but doesn’t get me sick, that would be great. I know it’s a sin praying for someone to die, but I don’t know what else to do. She always cries when I tell her how unhappy I am and she begs me not to leave her. It hurts seeing her face melt with tears and hearing her blubber like that, so I always cave in and agree to settle (I don’t tell her that, but it’s what I think). I don’t hate her…I just need her to die, that’s all. If there’s a way you can help me with that, I’d really appreciate it. Thank you again for giving me this day, and please help everything work out for the best. In the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, Amen.

Ken Mootz‘s short stories “Grocery List,” “Toothbrush,” “What Happens After You Die,” “Suicide Notes Are a Bitch,” “The First Time I Dropped Acid,” “Master of the Obvious,” and “She Better Say No” were published in Empty Sink Publishing, Livid Squid Literary Journal, Weirderary, Toad Suck Review, Fleas on the Dog and Door is a Jar. Additionally, Long Shot Books has just published Ken’s most recent short story “Lies He Tells Her.” Ken have also written two novels and seven screenplays, one of which was optioned by an independent studio.