When I was 16 years old, I spent some time in the countryside with a girl in Ohio. The first day we woke up late and went in to the city to have a hamburger at Wendy’s. Then we came back and rode horses. My horse began to gallup and ran through the woods and I caught my neck on a branch and fell down. Later that afternoon I said “I’m tired, I think I will take a nap” because I hoped that she would come into my room and have sex with me. She didn’t come into my room and have sex with me but she stayed outside and rode horses until dinner time. Her mother called out to us: “Dinnertime!” and I was inside and she was outside. After dinnertime I asked her mother “What time is it?” And it was nine o’clock and I looked outside and it was still light out! Imagine that, I thought. It’s still light outside and it is nine o’clock. Her father said: “Would you like something to drink?” and I said “Sure” and I was hoping for a Dr. Pepper and he poured my a jigger of rye. I asked “What do you call this?” and he said “a jigger.” “This jigger tastes really nice” I said. We then played Parcheesi. Her mother won the Parcheesi. We said goodnight, goodnight, goodnight, kids. We then went to bed. The next day we woke up. We rode horses and I fell down again. We went to Wendy’s for lunch again and I took a nap again and she still didn’t have sex with me. She was outside and I was inside. My head hurt and I didn’t want to ride a horse again. That night we had run out of rye and so we drank Dr. Pepper and it was still light out and after they said goodnight, goodnight, goodnight, kids.
RICKY GARNI was born and raised in Miami and Maine. He works as a graphic designer by day and writes music by night. COO, a tiny collection of short prose printed on college lined paper with found materials such as coins, stamps, was recently released by Bitterzoet Press.